we’re all just making it up
Every year for the last sixteen years, in the middle of February, I take a four day weekend, drive down to San Jose, CA and attend an event called Pantheacon. Every year it’s different and sometimes it’s a weekend of frivolity, sometimes it’s a weekend of deep introspection. Sometimes I’m participating in creating ritual theater or presenting a class/discussion and sometimes I’m there strictly to sit in on these things.
This weekend was one of the latter. I was there to take classes and join discussions, to hear others tell their stories and learn new things. If I had to take away a theme that the weekend presented to me it was this, stop being so hung up on “recreating” an exact replica of what the ancestors did, and embrace the fact that just like those who came before us, we’re creating something new.
As Pagans, we sometimes get our backs up about the antiquity of our practices. We try to cling to that as if it is all that provides us legitimacy. But what we are creating is a living faith that will sustain us in the dark times and offer us something to celebrate.
AND THAT’S OKAY!
Faith should be a living thing. It should be something that changes as we change, that grows as we learn and experience new things. It should be experiential.
I’ve considered myself Pagan for well over 20 years. I am NOT the Pagan I was then, or at many steps along the way. My belief has changed, my interactions with the Divine have changed. Even my understanding of what the Divine is has changed multiple times.
Admittedly, over the last few years, I’ve let my daily practice slide. I’ve not really celebrated my faith. I haven’t practiced it. Coming out of this year’s Pantheacon, I feel a gentle tug toward starting new, toward crafting a practice that will suit who I am today, and help me to live the faith that sustains my soul.
As a result, you might see a little more frequent posting here as I fumble my way through it. I hope you’re willing to come along for the ride.